On The Subject Of Reviews

Some providers love them, some loathe them and some see them as a necessary evil which they tolerate but strongly dislike. I’m in the “loathe them” camp and let me tell you why. It’s mainly due to the mentality of the men who congregate on review boards.

I was out of the industry during the time review boards became a big thing so I was unaware of them until I came back in 2019. I was looking for advertising venues when I came across a particularly nasty review board called USA Sex Guide. I started reading and genuinely felt sick to my stomach to see the way those men talked about us. They traded information on how to take advantage of survival workers, openly bragged about sexual assault and engaging in targeted harassment. They talked about us like we weren’t even human and described their exploits in the most vulgar manner. From there, I learned about ECCIE which is barely a step above USASG and TER (The Erotic Review). Even though the men of TER aren’t quite as vulgar in their language and rhetoric (most of the time), underneath it all they have the same mindset. They advocate for practices that compromise our safety and are aimed at keeping us in an inferior position. They get downright angry that they can’t dictate our rules, rates, how we screen or run our businesses in general. They’re like children throwing tantrums because they think they’re entitled to have access to any provider they want to see. They feel entitled to a fine dining experience for the price of a value meal.

Are those the kind of men I want as clients? My answer to that is a big HELL NO! I made up my mind that I would have a no review policy to avoid these undesirables and many other providers are of the same mind. I’ve heard from many ladies who’ve delisted from those sites saying that they’re much happier and draw better clients. Not one has expressed any regrets. They realized that they’ve been fed a lie: that without reviews you’ll never make money or be successful.

The review system as it currently exists is unfair and often cruel. Aside from Private Delights (PD) which has a normal type of review system, we’re not allowed to respond and challenge fake or malicious reviews. Some men go so far as to say providers shouldn’t even be allowed to see their own reviews. They argue that we should accept reviews just like any other business but those other businesses can read and respond to reviews. I’m convinced that hobbyists don’t want us to have the ability to respond because their bad behavior would be exposed. Reviews have been weaponized and used to coerce providers into doing things they’re uncomfortable with and most providers have been threatened with bad reviews at some point because they didn’t tolerate a client’s poor behavior. Just a few months ago I was threatened with a bad review simply for declining to see someone who made me uncomfortable. I’ve seen men openly admit to writing retaliatory reviews because a woman wouldn’t submit to certain acts (some of which may have been painful or could put her health at risk) or writing fake bad reviews on women whose rates they deem “too high” in an attempt to ruin their livelihoods (yes, take a look on Reddit’s client subforums and see for yourself). Providers have been put in dangerous situations because of false reviews.

Contrary to what they tell you on the forums, the majority of us are not avoiding reviews because we have something to hide or we’re bad providers. We are avoiding the predatory hobbyist types in favor of good clients who respect us, follow our rules and treat us like human beings. I hope this has given you some insight on my stance and thank you for taking the time to read!